By His Side
by DHeiress88
Summary: The Earl's reason finally became clear..."Why do you want to take Allen that badly?" ...Everything became clear yet everything was more vague..."Why?"...Why did tears fell from Allen's eyes..."By his side..." Everything will be reconsidered...
1. The Prologue

-By His Side-

-By: DeathHeiress88-

Summary: The Earl's reason finally became clear..."Why do you want to take Allen that badly?" ...Everything became clear yet everything was more vague..."Why?"...Why did tears fell from Allen's eyes..."By his side..." Everything will be reconsidered...

Disclaimer: I don't own DGM...

Warning: Spoiler Alert! Up to chap 196!

* * *

**Prologue**

**

* * *

**

"_Don't overwork yourself...I'll always be by your side..."_

"Why?"

The Earl stared at the shameless human that dared to ask him why he wanted to take Allen Walker when the said teen had tried to kill him before and thus, an enemy to him. How dare him... But...

The Maker paused for a moment, his gaze unwavering. Feeling the other Noah's gaze upon him, Adam answered.

"By his side."

"_I'll always be by your side..."_

"I want to be by the 14th's side."

Johnny gawked wide-eyed at the Noah, The 14th's side...? Does that mean The Earl really wants Allen to be a part of the Noah family? Wha—?

Road turned to the Earl, her eyes full of pity for the First Disciple. _He had missed __**him **__a lot, didn't he?_

Wisely smiled as he let one of his hands covered his right eye, '_Really...The Earl and the 14th's relationship...has so many complications...'_

Tyki's eyes went wide-open at the Earl's statement, a drop of sweat rolling on his cheek. Not only Tyki, but Sheryl was also wearing one very shocked face that would have made his little brother laugh if only said brother was focusing on him.

Allen no longer felt the gigantic hand crushing his whole body. He no longer heard the sounds of the battle across the room. He could no longer see Johnny or anyone else. All he can see was The Earl. The Earl and that strange memory that keeps replaying in his head.

His hand was outstretched at someone with a blurry face...And with a voice that was unfamiliar but he knew that was once his own, the same lines was repeated...

_Don't overwork yourself...I'll always be by your side... _

That was the time, Allen felt tears rolling from his eyes.

But are these tears his own or entirely someone else's?

'_By the 14__th__'s side...Does that mean he wants to be by __**my**__ side...?'_

_

* * *

_

Just something that I wrote on a whim while reading chap 196...I might or might not continue this...

And yes, the shortest chappy I had ever written... I'm not sure 'bout pairing but I'll put Poker pair 'cause all of my fics end up as that whether I want it or not...

Anyway please...

_**REVIEW!**_


	2. Thus, it shall be free

-By His Side-

-By: DeathHeiress88-

Previously: Memories...Truth...Lies...Everything that had happened has a meaning...It's just that we won't see it until the time we need to...

Disclaimer: I don't own DGM...

Warning: Spoiler Alert! Up to chap 197! Everything before this chapter is the same in this story but after it...

Thanks for your reviews:

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* * *

**Thus, it shall be free...**

**

* * *

**

Allen felt his mind and body float after the Earl's statement but he didn't let that get in the way. Because he know that he need to save all the people who believe in him, even Kanda whose rage he can't decipher...

But...

"_WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT ME? WHAT DO YOU KNOW, YOU FUCKING NOAH?"_

Allen lost his cool after Kanda let those words out his mouth. Everything was a blur after that. All he could remember was the harshness and invisible pain Kanda's and his shouts brought to each other. All he could recall was the Earl's voice saying something about Dark Matter and Alma.

"_What are you? A friend of Yuu?"_

How Kanda slowly approached him while his words slowly sunk into Allen's chest...

"_Whose fault do you think this is...? Why Alma became like that...Why the third exorcists are transformed into monsters...?"_

"_IT'S YOUR ENTIRE FUCKING FAULT! THE ONE WHO BELONGS TO THE ORDER WHEN HE'S A NOAH!"_

"_KANDA!"_

"_SHUT UP, YOU NOAH BASTARD!"_

"_Don't stop them..."_

"_As long as Yuu is alive..."_

...And the pain of those words...

How the pain of those words hurt more than the way Kanda stab him square at the stomach...

"_Take a careful look at Alma...why do you think he's making that kind of expression...?"_

"_I...have absolutely no idea..."_

A push to disentangle himself with Kanda's sword...

A voice whispering...

"_Moyashi..."_

That was all Allen could remember...

'_Maybe this is what death is like...' _Allen thought as he slowly fall, Kanda's eyes widening as blood shower both of them...

Allen didn't feel his skin change into that of a Noah's...

He didn't see the worried and shocked glances of Bak, Fou, Johnny, Reever and a few others...didn't see the smiles and sparkling eyes of the Noahs...

He didn't see Alma stand in front of Kanda...silently asking the Japanese to choose...

Neither did he heard the Japanese silently whisper Alma's name and understand the weight of his decision...

He wasn't able to do, see, hear or feel anything...just the faint beats of his heart that were slowly fading into nothing.

But maybe, just a little doubt of maybe, he felt a certain Noah come between Alma and Kanda and carried him gently...

And maybe he did hear the Earl say...

"We'll be taking our 14th back..."

_"But that would be the death of him...right...Shounen...?"_

* * *

Another short chappy...I'm so sorry...

Ahem...I'm not sure whether to put this under Poker Pair or Yullen...

I think I'll be following the updates of DGM manga...

But next chap would be a lot more different than chap 198...

So please...

**REVIEW~!**


	3. Something Called Love

-By His Side-

-By: DeathHeiress88-

Previously: Noah…? What are they…? Though it is unknown, one thing's for sure…all those with their blood cannot gain happiness…All they could have is the mere illusion of something called family…

Disclaimer: I don't own DGM...

Warning: Spoiler Alert! Up to chap 196! Everything before this chapter is the same in this story but after it...

Thanks for your reviews:

Faevyn

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* * *

**Something Called Love**

**

* * *

**

_Is it really worth the fight?_

_That something called love?_

_When you give all your might_

_In the path of destruction, it still drove…_

_

* * *

_

"_THANK YOU! ALLEN WALKER'S NOW GONE!"_

He could still hear them, the fight, the clashes of steel and metal, the angry retorts of Kanda…

"_I did that to him…?"_

He could feel warm arms surrounding his cold body, could feel hands caressing his hair and face…

But then, what's left of his senses started dimming…

Everything faded…

All was nothing…

Until…

"_And you too, 'Allen', became a mad puppet…"_

_Tyki…?_

"_Wrong."_

_Then, who…?_

"_I'm Nea."_

_

* * *

_

_What is it really?_

_That something called love?_

_That they say ends happily_

_But in reality just ends sharply with a shove…_

_

* * *

_

Tyki cradled the Exorcist-turned-Noah teen sweetly. He wondered what kind of dream his shounen was having. They were still in the battlefield, but for Tyki the only thing that mattered was the life of their new family member.

The one he is cradling right now.

_Shounen…_

As he sat there, arms around a gray-skinned Allen, oblivious to their bloody surroundings, he wondered once again…

_Why did you fight for them…?_

He remembered what Allen answered that third-level long, long ago. Back when he acquired back his left arm.

_Is it because you love them…?_

"_My left hand for Akumas, my right for humans…"_

_Then…answer me…_

He sensed someone preparing to attack him…

But he just calmly tucked a stray white strand into its rightful place and traced his shounen's scar dotingly.

_What is that something called love…?_

And then there was the sudden clash of swords.

* * *

_It hurts doesn't it?_

_That something called love?_

_Is it really a gift?_

_Or maybe a curse from Above?_

_

* * *

_

_Nine years ago…_

_You destroyed me and lived on Yuu…_

_But that was to keep your promise with me, huh…?_

Allen heard does words clearly, and they broke his heart, though he doesn't know why…

'_What is going on…?'_

His eyes fluttered open, he was met by gold orbs framed by a tanned face.

"Shhh…Sleep…"

Somewhere near him, he heard a groan.

It was Fou's voice, she sounded hurt but…

Allen didn't care…didn't want to care…

Couldn't care…

'_I want to sleep…'_

_Yuu is the only person I didn't want to lose!_

'_He was also something like that to me…But…'_

_

* * *

_

_But it makes you happy, right?_

_That something called Love?_

_Can you tell me how to solve this plight?_

'_Cause if you don't, then I'll just mindlessly rove…_

_

* * *

_

Tyki smiled when he saw Allen's eyes closing, the once silver orbs were now golden. He picked the boy up, giving no mind to the blonde and his spirit guardian laying a few steps away from them.

He smiled once again when he saw the dark-haired exorcist broken, helpless…

_What goes around, comes around, right?_

The other remnants of the Black Order could only stare as the Noah of Pleasure step back into the Ark, whistling a familiar tune.

As the Ark Gate close, bringing Allen Walker and the Third Exorcists, so did the flickering hope the Black Order had.

* * *

A hand gently patted snow-white hair as golden orbs stared at the teen.

The Earl in his human form.

A smile was cast upon the boy as a thought linger inside the dark room.

"_I had come for you now…Since you can no longer live in that place…"_

_

* * *

_

_Sadly, I really can't understand…_

_How something can fully throve_

_Only to topple from where it stand…_

_That something called Love…_

_

* * *

_

Yeah I know...It short, right?

I'm really sorry about it but...

Anyway, please Review!


	4. Dreams

-By His Side-

-By: DeathHeiress88-

Previously: Love…? What is that…? Is it the ecstasy? Is it the selfish want to be by someone's side or the selfless protection to someone? Is it sacrifice? Or is it just a favorite illusion of a hopeless romantic…?

Disclaimer: I don't own DGM...

Warning: Spoiler Alert! Up to chap 196! Everything before this chapter is the same in this story but after it...

I want to thank the following for their reviews:

lilanimefan247

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I really want to thank you, especially those who had endured my irregular updates not only in this fic but also in Innocent Betrayal. Thanks guys~!Maraming Salamat~!

* * *

**Dreams**

* * *

_**Hey Allen…**_

"Hey…Why aren't you crying…?"

_I'm a real idiot…_

"You lived with this dog everyday didn't you? Aren't you even sad…?"

_At that time, I cannot understand either of them…_

"I'm so sad I could just die."

_**Come to think of it, I never asked…**_

"STOP THAT!"

_Master and Mana…_

"Actually, I can't cry."

"_I knew all along."_

"Maybe my tears have all dried up… they won't come not matter what."

_It was only when my reflection started to grow dimmer as __**his**__became clearer…_

_**Do you like Tim?**_

"_When the Fourteenth died, I promised him I'd watch over Mana…"_

_That I stopped denying that there's another being inside my body…_

"Yesterday I pet him and he licked me…His tongue was warm…"

"_And if I did that, someday you'd return to Mana's side."_

_Or the possibility that it wasn't my body in the first place…_

"So today I'd thought…I thought…"

"_That's…what you promised me…Allen…" _

_**I handed him over and told you to hang on to him, but…**_

_That, I, Allen Walker was a just mere illusion made by The Fourteenth…_

"_Or should I say…Fourteenth…?"_

"That's all so why am I crying…? Why…?"

"_The implanted memory will erode the host until eventually turns you into the Fourteenth…"_

_It hurt me more when I realized that the love I was showered with when I was still with Mana was meant for another…_

"_When Mana said 'I love you' did he mean…me…or…?"_

"_What would you do…If I told you that when you turn into the Fourteenth…"_

_I tried to ignore everything…But in the end, I was nothing but a failure…_

"_Hey. Long time no see…shounen~!"_

_I let them kill Tokusa…and…Kanda…_

"Oh…I see."

_**From the start, it was my intent to give him to you…**_

_Kanda…_

You were Allen's friend, weren't you?

* * *

There's something I'd like to say

It's about when you lose your way

Remember that I'll be by your side

Even if you trip, tumble or slide

* * *

"Even in his sleep he still looks troubled, doesn't he?"

Tyki looked at Road, the usual giddy aura covering her now gone. The Pleasure looked at his hands and said nonchalantly, "I keep on wondering what he is dreaming… What is it that makes him like that…"

_What is it that could make him happy…for once…?_

Road looked at the Portuguese, hearing his silent thought. She smiled perceptively and held Allen's hand.

_Really, Allen…you're a true part of our family…_

"It's strange for you think about someone that way, Tyki."

_By blood and by feelings…_

_

* * *

_

I'll be your beacon in the dark night

As you stray from your path without light

With you, a small cave could be a dome

With you I'm already home

* * *

When he first saw the two concerned faces hovering above him, Allen suddenly realized something.

_Who…are they again?_

But after a moment of blank ogling, memories suppressed by dreams resurfaced.

"Road…and…Tyki…?"

Allen felt warmth spreading through his body as Road hugged him. He felt her heart beating against his chest, though he doesn't know why, he felt his whole body loosing up.

The boy closed his eyes and let Road's heartbeat lull him again to sleep.

Before he completely surrenders his self to slumber, he heard Tyki saying something.

"Welcome home…_Allen_…"

A memory was triggered by that simple statement and Allen couldn't stop the tear that ran down is left cheek.

"_I'm home, Mana!"_

"_Welcome home, Allen."_

In recollection of this, he couldn't help but utter groggily.

"Am I…home now…?"

Then there came the sweet oblivion called sleep.

* * *

You won't lose your way home

'Cause every time you'll turn to me

I'll keep say'ng 'welcome home'

I know that I'm your home as you are to me

* * *

Truth to be told, I was tempted for another amnesiac Allen but had decided against it at the last moment…

Though it's still short, it's longer than the others are, so I hope I'm forgiven…?

Umm…

Comment? Suggestions? Angry Retorts?

**REVIEWS?**


	5. A Home To Come Back To

-By His Side-

-By: DeathHeiress88-

Previously: Home…they say that's where the heart is… If that's so, then where is the _heart_? In a lover? In a friend? In a family? Where? A true home…where is that?

Disclaimer: I don't own DGM...

Warning: Spoiler Alert! Up to chap 196! Everything before this chapter is the same in this story but after it...

I want to thank the following for their reviews:

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* * *

**A Home To Come Back To**

* * *

The thing is, you'll never know what's its worth

Until you lose it and sadness go forth

* * *

Under the foreboding moon, the distraught girl leaped in anguish.

"**Allen would never just come with them! He would never just run away!"**

Searching for the friend that was a big part of her world, despair and hope mixed inside her.

"**I have to bring him back…this is some Noah trap!"**

Wanting to believe in him for all it's worth, she hastened in her search_._

"**He wouldn't…He'd never betray us like this!"**

With the moonlight mercifully guiding her, she seeks for the friend she didn't want to let go.

"**ALLEN!"**

If she let him go…

"_Oi, Baka Moyashi!"_

"_My name is ALLEN, BaKanda!"_

"_Ma, ma, calm down, Moyashi-chan, Yuu-chan."_

"_WHAT DID YOU CALL ME, BAKA USAGI?"_

"_REPEAT WHAT YOU JUST SAY, LAVI!"_

"_Just joking!"_

Her world was slowly crumbling down…its continents gradually breaking apart…

_Kanda…_

_Lavi…_

_Allen…_

With renewed strength, Lenalee screamed at the forest below her.

Allen would surely hear her…

Won't he?

"**PLEASE DON'T GO, ALLEN!"**

* * *

And you're bound to regret it at the end

For the bonds will not be able mend

* * *

"Allen and the Noah…?

"Yeah…I saw it! The Noah carried him away and…and he didn't resist at all…"

"Shit! So the Order isn't good enough for him anymore!"

"ALLEN'S NOT LIKE THAT!"

The gossiping members of the Science Department looked around to see Johnny on the verge of tears.

"Johnny…"

Everybody became silent as tears slowly sprang from Johnny's eyes.

"Why…?"

"_Why? Why do you want to take Allen with you so badly?"_

"Why did it have to turn out…"

"_By his side…"_

"Like this?"

"_I want to be by the 14__th__'s side…"_

* * *

Your doubt sprouts from the fear of betrayal

Thus come to thoughts of being disloyal

* * *

_Home…?_

Silver orbs blinked groggily as sleep slowly lifted its fog from his brain.

_Where…?_

Suddenly, a memory flashed in his mind.

"_Welcome home…Allen…"_

"_Am I …home now…?"_

"Home…"

The word left a taste he couldn't tell on his mouth. Allen clutched his stomach as it suddenly ached, then another memory surfaced from the confines of his mind.

"_Take a careful look at Alma...why do you think he's making that kind of expression...?"_

_He looked at the eyes that was filled with both hate and sorrow then continued._

"_I...have no idea..."_

Unexpectedly, tears sprang in his eyes, stinging a path down his cheeks.

_Master…_

_Link…_

_Kanda…Alma…_

_Bookman and Lavi…_

_Lenalee…_

_Everyone…_

"Where…is my true…home?"

_Where could I go back?_

* * *

Your ignorance to his pain is a sin

He's just looking for a home to dwell in

* * *

Lenalee's legs gave away as she reached the forest 's clearing. Tears ran down her face as frustration took hold of her.

She wasn't able to find Allen…

Kanda is already gone from the Order…probably also from _this world…_

Lavi…Lavi has gone MIA on them…

If things go on this way, then, Allen…Allen will…

She will also lose Allen!

"Allen…Allen…" The sobs wracked her tired body, the tears blurring her vision. She collapsed on the ground, unconscious.

_Allen…if you go…we'll have to fight each other…_

One last tear escaped the girl's eyes and ran down the grass beneath her.

_Don't go...!_

_ALLEN!_

* * *

The seeds of chaos and war had been sown

As he sadly looks for a home to own

* * *

And finally, the new chapter is out!

Thank you for the ones who put me and/or the story on their favorite and/or alert list! Though I have one wish for you guys…

Can you please leave me a review? Just for me to know why you put me on your list? Please?

And of course, thank you to the guys who reviewed! You're the reason why I updated this chapter~!

Reviews help me write!

So…

**PLEASE REVIEW!**


	6. Decision to make, Sacrifices to take

-By His Side-

-By: DeathHeiress88-

"Decisions…It's something one shouldn't take lightly…There's no wrong one, but there is no right one either. What really matters, however, is the resolve to sacrifice something for what you decided to do…"

**Disclaimer: I don't own DGM...**

**Warning:** Spoiler Alert! Up to chap 196! Everything before this chapter is the same in this story but after it...

**I want to thank you for your review:**

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weirdsquirrelgirl

If you guys didn't review, I would probably be moping in an unused corner wondering whether someone like my chappies…

But I'm really sorry about the update time, there's something wrong with my FF account. Something about the verification image that I cannot see yet the page insists is there…

Logging In problems aside, on with the story!

* * *

**Decisions To Make, Sacrifices To Take**

* * *

Can you have the resolve to choose your side

When deciding keeps eating you inside?

* * *

_I sow chaos and conflict, huh?_

He was awake again, unable to remain in a dream where there is Mana and Master…and Lenalee and Lavi…and Kanda…and…and…

Everyone.

Where there is the foolish yet utter and vast happiness.

_Is it because…I still don't know what exactly I am…?_

Allen sat in the same bed he had woken in, staring at his dark-skinned hands yet at the same time unseeing them.

_I feel like a traveler that was so sure of where he was heading…only to have that delusion broken when there was suddenly a fork in the road that wasn't on the map he was holding…_

The boy felt the tears coming out, but he blinked them back. No, there's no use in crying anymore. He had shed too many tears before, it's time to stop them now.

It's already enough.

* * *

It isn't as simple as left and right

You mustn't let your goal out of your sight

* * *

Marquis Tyki Mikk sighed as he felt nicotine filled his lungs again. He was quite sure that he had stopped smoking after the 'Incident' in their former Ark. But now he found himself smoking drugs in quantity that would have killed a normal human.

Well, he wasn't 'normal', anyway. So what's to worry about?

And for some reason unbeknownst even to his self, Tyki can't worry about anything else other than the boy in _his _bed. The boy seemed to be on the verge of tears, but he was trying his best to not to let them out.

For that, Tyki felt something unfamiliar restricting his chest.

The boy looked so…lost.

It was as if he was not the same cheating boy that Tyki the Human met on the train. The one filled with confidence, humor and, the thing he respected most, a gallantry that no one especially Tyki himself can't manage.

He took another drag of his cigarette as he watched the boy stare at his hands. Tyki had a feeling though, that the boy was not really _seeing_ what he was looking at. The boy had been awake for some time now, but he hadn't made any move at all.

Tyki would bet his last stick that the boy didn't even know that he was with him. And to add salt to injuries, slept through the week in _Tyki's_ bed.

The Portuguese placed his chin in his palm, his eyes never straying away from the boy in _his_ bed.

Sheryl had said something about a ball, something about welcoming the new member of their family… Tyki narrowed his eyes at that thought, wondering whether his _brother_ was a really fool or was only pretending to be one.

Even after the years they've been with each other, Tyki can't understand what Sheryl is thinking. All of them knew that The 14th would never willingly go back to them. But Sheryl organized this party even without Road's request, which was the only reason Sheryl ever does something, and even forced everyone to go.

And there's the fact that Sheryl hold a grudge to the 14th, which later escalated to full-blown jealousy because of Road's closeness to the 14th_._

So why celebrate…?

_Sheryl…what the hell are you planning…?_

Tyki forced a stop in his thoughts, knowing that he really didn't want to understand the complications in his 'family'_._ So instead of dwelling on it further, he crushed what was left of his smoke and decided to end the boy's reverie.

"Shounen~!"

The startled expression on the said boy's face brought a smirk on the Pleasure's face. Tyki promptly ignored the emotions that passed through the boy's eyes as he stood up and walked close to the boy.

Anger, confusion, sadness, rejection, embarrassment…

_How can he hold so many of them at once?_

He leant in close, nose almost touching that of the boy's, lips almost caressing the other, and whispered.

"Do you know how to waltz?"

* * *

One thing's for sure in whatever you choose

It's that there's something that you'll surely lose

* * *

Something's definitely wrong here.

Allen can't really understand why the Noah of Pleasure was twirling him around and around _against _his will. The boy's eyebrows shot up and then twitched in surprise and annoyance as the older man began to take his hand in one hand and waist in the other to begin _another _circling bout.

"What are you doing?"

Allen knows that his voice was awkward and stiff, and he probably looked lame in the eyes of the Noah but he didn't care. He didn't even care that he was in enemy's camp _and _he was doing nothing to get out. He didn't have the energy to care.

He was exhausted.

Of the battles, of the betrayals, of the rules…

Of the goodbyes…of the letting go's…

Of the heartbreaks and tears…

Of everything.

Thus, there comes the blank response to everything and everyone. He can't really find the will to fight Tyki Mikk or any of the Noahs that he was sure are lurking around inside this black Ark.

And even though he has a good reason to, he can't hate the Order. It was—is still —his home…but the thing that the superiors had done to Alma and Kanda…

"_Moyashi…"_

The remorse of not being able to save anyone didn't come. Allen knew that it was deep in there but he can't really feel it with the black hole conquering his heart.

He was surprised when he noticed that the Noah had stopped twirling him inside the room (which he realized, in fascinated horror, was _Tyki Mikk's _bedroom) and was now looking at him with some unknown emotion.

The grip on both his waist and hand tighten.

"You're not participating."

Allen sighed and tried to force his self out of the Noah's grip, but to no avail, the Portuguese only tighten more.

So Allen stopped struggling and said in his best poker face at the moment, "Do you expect me to do so? You yanked me out of the bed and you're just leading me in circles around this room. What's there to participate in?"

To his dismay, instead of dampening the Third's spirits, it only made the Noah smirk.

He was pulled closer to the other man's body. "That's what we called waltz, shounen."

The hot breath on his ear irritates Allen but there was something else that bothers the boy greater. It was the smirk on the Pleasure's face.

"Well, if you want something you can participate in…"

The Noah leant in closer than what Allen considered casual. And in a sudden moment of panic, Allen thought that lips would soon collide with lips—

"Tyki, what are you doing to Allen?"

The expected collision did not happen, instead the broad arms and chest was replaced with soft and lithe ones.

Then, there was Road.

"Allen~! You're awake!"

For some reason, Allen's body relaxed against her small one. However, his eyebrows twitched as the Noahs talked as if he was not there.

"Tyki what are you doing to Allen!" Road was pouting and glaring at Tyki but Allen felt that she knew the answer already.

The Portuguese shrugged and lit another smoke before answering, "I was teaching him how to dance."

"Sennenko, wants to see you, you know?"

"Yeah, yeah. I understand, milady. I will go there at once, milady."

Allen watched the older man walked out of the room, cigarette in hand, striding away in an elegant manner.

It was only when Road started spinning him around in what should be a waltz, saying something about Allen should practice with her instead of Tyki because she is a girl and Allen would be dancing with _girls_, that Allen closed his eyes in confusion.

He really can't fathom why he had suddenly wished Tyki Mikk didn't leave.

* * *

Decisions are too difficult to make

Specially if both could cause you to break

* * *

"Bookman, what exactly was the relationship between the 14th and Road?"

A drop of sweat ran down Bookman's cheek.

_This is…_

He knows he had to make a choice, quickly and smartly or else 'Lavi' would…

_The history that we're supposed to record…_

But he was late, The Noah of Desires took the liberty of punishing his apprentice. Bookman could only close his eyes as his Junior's tortured screams filled his ears.

_It's starting to move on its own…_

"Spit it out, Bookman."

_It must be done._

* * *

Do you understand the weight of your choice?

Like the sacrifice of your freedom's voice?

* * *

The afternoon that was spent spinning around the room left Allen reeling in confusion. So many things coming at him at once. Like a whirlwind, emotions keep bustling about.

In the end, confusion turned to fatigue and he was catapulted into a troubled sleep. His dreams keep hurling Allen into one problem and then tossing him back into the previous.

"_I curse you, Allen!"_

"_Allen-kun, I had a nightmare…In there the Order was destro—"_

"—_you who belong to the Order when he is a Noa—"_

"—_oahs are humans too, you know?"_

"—_need to kill the people you love when you turn into…"_

"…_The Fourteenth had a blood relative. An older brother."_

"_Why are you siding with the Noahs…?"_

"_Timcanpy and Allen…they are the things important for the revival of the Fourteenth…"_

Allen twisted in Tyki's bed, nightmares plaguing his worn out mind. But the most vivid of all, the one that made him wake up in drenched in sweat and tears, was the voice that keeps echoing in his head, taunting him in his sleep.

A voice that was familiar, once his own but now lost to his mind…

"_Don't overwork yourself…I'll always be by your side…"_

* * *

"_Kind of ironic isn't it?"_

_Cross Marian slowly draws the boy towards him, careful not to let his cigarette stick touch silver-white hair. It was the first time that he openly showed any physical closeness to the boy, and it was probably the last._

_**I never expected it to be a kid like this.**_

"_Should've picked some poor bastard nobody will miss for his host…not too kind of him, was it…?"_

_He closed his eyes and steeled his self for the news he's about to say._

"_Geez, I can't laugh at Tiedoll, anymore…"_

_Though he knew he was acting out of character, 'Allen' needs this. The boy was still young, still needs comfort in times like this…_

"_What would you do…If I told you that when you turn into the Fourteenth…"_

_**I guess that it's the same old story, huh? **_

"_You'll have to kill the people you love?"_

_**To protect one thing…something else had to be sacrificed…**_

* * *

In deciding which way to go, there is no wrong or right

It's just whether you can carry the sacrifice's plight

* * *

And so, the plot is moving on…so…

S…l…o…w…l…y…

And will continue to do so until The Authoress decided to just get into the point!

Next chapter, The Earl and Allen will finally meet (properly)!

Please Help!

I have problems in logging in… There's this verification image the site gives me every time I TRIED to log in…But the thing is, I can't see it! The site displays "Are you human?" but there's no image under it. But there are (very, _very_) rare times where I can log in w/out problem…But most of the time I can't log in because of that!

I can't update normally!

Please **HELP** ME and **REVIEW**!


	7. Dancing with Time, Changing in Rhyme

-By His Side-

-By: DeathHeiress88-

"Little by little, like flower buds slowly blossoming, we turn into someone else and influence others to also change… We will never be the same again as the person we were the second before… We can never change back; all we could do, whether we turned for the better or for the worse, is to walk forward and let it be as we change yet again by the day."

Disclaimer: I don't own DGM...

Warning: Spoiler Alert! Up to chap 196! Everything before this chapter is the same in this story but after it...

* * *

**Changing in Rhyme, Dancing with Time**

* * *

Watching as the cogs of time turn slowly

We didn't see ourselves changing steadily

Regretting the things that did not happen

For people that were lost, feeling sadden

* * *

In hindsight, he should have expected this meeting to come.

He was in their home, he was with them…and, in a way he didn't want to recognize, he was _one _of them. So, Allen shouldn't have been shocked, he _should _have anticipated _this._

"How are your injuries?"

The Earl, in his human form, sat a distance before him. Their gazes locked and Allen immediately heard the echoes of a wish in his mind.

_By his side…_

_I want to be by the 14__th__'s side…_

…_By the 14__th__'s side…_

_The 14__th__'s side…_

_The Fourteenth…_

_Does that mean by Allen's side or…_

_By __**his **__side…?_

Allen laced his fingers together to stop their trembling and closed his eyes.

Once upon a time, when he simply exists for the sake of humans, when he only knew of the Noahs in passing, when The Fourteenth never existed, when Kanda was just an idiotic jerk and not the lone survivor of a terrible experiment of the Order, when he knew not of the Third exorcists, he wished to kill the Earl.

He wished to avenge Mana, to right his mistake of dealing with the Earl caused by his grief and childishness.

But now…

Now that his world was no longer separated by the clear line between black and white, where the Earl was once on the Black side and the Order was once sitting on the pristine White…Now that his world was in indistinct Gray, now that he's unsure of who really needed saving and who needed to be fought…

He no longer knew what he wished to do.

He opened his eyes, albeit not meeting the Earl's, and unconsciously touched the patch in his stomach where Mugen ran through. It no longer hurts… by now, it was nothing more than a new scar.

Just a new scar…

"_Whose fault do you think this is...? Why Alma became like that...Why the third exorcists are transformed into monsters...?"_

"Fine…I guess."

The Earl bobbed his head in mindless agreement and they lapsed into the silence that had stretched within the room when the Earl first stepped into it.

* * *

Seeing things in different perspectives

Describing the old with new adjectives

Every second we keep changing in rhyme

As we danced with a tune as old as Time

* * *

The Earl hadn't cared about the Bookman and his apprentice, he probably didn't even notice they were in the Ark. Their Patriarch had been too concerned with The Fourteenth and Sheryl didn't know whether to be grateful for the distraction or to be pissed off since _everyone _seems distracted by Allen Walker.

Road twirled Lero around, she seems happy, humming a tune that Sheryl didn't recognize. She seems unable to stop talking about _Allen, Allen, Allen, _always damn, fucking _Allen!_

"The ball will be tomorrow night. Have you picked your dress yet, Darling?" Sheryl asked, stabbing his bacon with more force needed. Road spun around to face him, and beamed, "Not yet, will you help me pick one out, Daddy?"

"Of course, Sweetheart." He replied sweetly, chewing his breakfast in a not-so-graceful manner. Road only giggled a reply and twirled out of the room, Lero in lithe hands.

The remaining Apostles in the dining Hall remained quiet. The only noises were the clinking of utensils, Tyki's absentminded comments about the food and Sheryl's, vain, attempts at a real conversation.

He narrowed his eyes at Tyki, who was frowning at his own sausages. Damn, his brother's mind is flying somewhere else again.

'_Hovering over a certain white-haired teen perhaps?' _Sheryl's mind suggested.

He grind his teeth, he didn't like it. Road and Tyki being so…_caring_ for that boy. He didn't like it one bit but…

"You never liked him at all, Noah-sama. Back then or now."

Tyki and Lulubell raised their eyes to Wisely, who was smiling at Sheryl. It was only now, a little too late for him top save his dignity and thoughts, that Sheryl remembered that Wisely was, and still is, a nosy bastard that liked to poke around people's minds.

_Damn, stop jabbing around my head._

To this, Wisely only cocked his head sideward and smiled.

* * *

Our thoughts altered as our emotions sway

The thin line between friends and foes hover

And then become clear as a cloudy day

What are you now, my once foe, once lover?

* * *

Truth to be told, he expected swords to be unsheathed and blood to be splattered. He would not be surprised if Akumas jump out and charged at him to kill. He expected bloodshed and the like.

But he never got any.

"Kanda Yuu escaped the Order."

Allen looked up from his hands, which were suddenly the most interesting things for him this past hour.

"What happened to…Alma Karma?"

He asked, a lump forming in his throat. He already knew the answer, though.

"_It_ died of course. Kanda Yuu killed _it."_

_It…_

_It…The Womb…_

_The Mother of the Third Exorcists…_

'_Kanda killed __**her**__…'_

He wondered forlornly whether Kanda realized whom it was he had killed…

_Yuu is the only person I didn't want to lose!_

Something rose inside him, a feeling that he instinctively knew but has no exact words for. It bubbled inside him as memories of thoughts not his echoed.

_Nine years ago…_

"_I finally understand…why you betrayed me, Yuu…"_

_You destroyed me and lived on, Yuu…_

"_It's because of you that I become an Akuma!"_

"_I'll wait for you…I'll wait forever…"_

_But that was to keep your promise, huh…?_

He clenched his fists and gritted his teeth somehow to stop the turmoil inside him. He didn't know why he was so affected…Why he felt something like grief when thinking about Alma and Kanda…

Could it be…?

He felt eyes on him and this time he forgot that it was The Earl in front of him. His eyes became locked with golden orbs and the Earl whispered idly, "You're taking this quite calmer than I expected."

The golden eyes were cold, but beneath the mask of indifference, he could a few hints of emotions. Shock…and amusement perhaps?

There was a slight buzz in Allen's head and a tiny voice in his mind kept on asking him what the hell he was doing, twirling around with Noahs, sleeping in beds of Noahs, chatting away with Noahs…

A scoff escaped the boy's lips.

"It's probably because I've already lost my sanity."

Yes, that is doubtlessly the reason why he was still here.

A strange feeling enveloped him, a feeling of queer lightness and sense of freedom. He felt free but then he realized is body was starting to act oddly. A smile slowly curved his lips and Allen didn't really know why.

And snippets of conversations invaded his mind.

"—_by your side."_

"—_to be the Earl—!"_

"_If you take care of Man—"_

He didn't realize that his silvery-blue orbs morphed into golden amber.

* * *

Our world changed for worse and then for worst

The transformation's inevitable

We knew it and promised not to get lost

But then we did something regrettable

* * *

Everything was a blur.

He didn't even remember how he escaped the Crows that went after him. He wasn't even sure if he managed to kill Al…

_That person…_

He don't know, and didn't want to know, whether the warm liquid flowing on his cheeks was blood or something else. He groped at his side for Mugen, only to remember that he had left it in the fray.

He felt weak…powerless…

In his mind, the images of three persons mingled, merged then separated and mixed again.

Alma… The lonely boy that can still smile even after he beat him up.

The girl that dances among the lotuses… _Alma_…?

The beansprout…the one that radiates innocence that irritates him.

The one he turned into a Noah…

"_Take a look at Alma…"_

_A soft touch on his shoulder, a vain attempt to dislodge the sword he stabbed through the boy's stomach…_

_Blood showering them both…_

_Lotuses becoming tainted with red…_

He closed his eyes, mindless of the tears underneath his lashes. He needed to forget, even just for some time…

Before he totally gave in to sleep, Kanda Yuu wondered if he 'd wake up again.

* * *

Memories of days that gone by and died

Haunted the scared us when we tried to hide

So now, the bright haze of our cherished youth

Is the only thing that to us can soothe

* * *

He wanted to ask The Earl about many things, but none of them came out. It was as if…as if…

Someone else was controlling his body, making him say thing he never thought he knew.

"Why did you betray me?"

The Earl's voice was quiet but it was strong. This has been the first time Allen had seen The Earl in his human form, the first time to hear him talking in his voice tinged with humanity. But…_it was familiar._

"You already know why I did." his mouth, but at the same time not his, had replied.

"No, I don't."

The Earl rose and started towards the bed and an odd thrill ran through his body. It was…

Fear? No…

Shock? Not really.

_Anticipation …?_

"Yes you do."

"Do we need to play this game?"

A smirk found its way to Allen's, but not really _Allen's,_ face and in a mocking voice _he _said, "You used to like our games, Adam."

The Earl was closer now, and Allen cannot see how this man in front of him be the same with the fat man that taunted his dreams, awake and sleeping. He looked like…Man—

"Neah_,_ _you—_"

The Earl had taken a hold of his wrist, and it was the first time the Earl had shown him any real emotion.

_Fury._

But as quickly as he had sprang on Allen, The Patriarch rapidly coiled back, as if the touch of Allen's skin burned him. Allen reflexively cradled his wrist, vaguely noting that his control in his body was back.

The Earl quickly whirled out of the room, but before he closed the door, he whispered tightly, "Rest for today, _Allen_."

But Allen didn't rest. Instead, he sat on Tyki's bed, still cradling his wrist and wondering what in the bloody hell happened.

* * *

We faced each other again and wondered

Where in the world the old us had wandered

Now I don't know who you are anymore

Nor myself for I'm lost forever more

* * *

This chapter is…pivotal for the plot…so please bear with the 'stillness' in it…It's kind of boring in my eyes but necessary…

I can't help but put a little of Human!Earl/Neah , so sorry for those who didn't like it. Let me tell you though that I like Human!Earl/Neah (not _that _much though) so you'll probably read another paragraph or two of it in the next chapters.

I'm gonna change the pace and writing style next chappy so please stay tuned!

**PWEASE WEVIEW~! NYAA~!**


	8. Emergency! Petition!

I have been recently made aware of FFN mass deleting stories that contained violence, sexual situations, and inspired by songs. It would that almost all of the stories here in FFN will be deleted, probably including most of my stories and the epic others that had inspired and touched us... A message was sent to me a day ago regarding a way that might help us awaken FFN authorities about their stupid idea, I wanted to share it:

There is a website created specially to fight against fanfiction net and their stupid idea to erase stories:

www. change petitions/fanfiction-net-stop-the-destruction-of-fanfiction-net#(google it) PLEASE PLEASE TAKE A MINUTE OUT OF YOUR DAY AND SIGN TO STOP THIS! Oh and could you please send this to as many people? It would mean a lot thank you! :D Dont just be a signer spread the news!


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